Learn to prioritize

Aight, lets get to it. Women wanting to party when they have kids at home to take care of. Touchy subject? To some it is, but only because they know they are dead wrong in doing so because of how they are doing it. There is nothing wrong with a little partying every now and then, but when you are going out every weekend and coming home wreaking of Hennessey or G Double (Grey Goose), then there is a problem. Your children could be getting neglected. Now notice I said, "could be", not that they were. It depends on the circumstances and how much time you are spending with your kids. Now if you are spending time with them during the day by taking them to the park, zoo, Chuck E. Cheese ,or whatever and then going out to the club at night time, well that's fine. But if all you are doing is letting them sit in front of the TV all day and then you drop them off at your mommas house Saturday night and then don't come and pick them up until Sunday afternoon, then that's a problem.

I get that most of these women didn't get to experience all of the fun of hanging out with friends because they may have had their children at a young age, but that's where the growing up should have come into play. You can't go back and get those years back. Once you become a parent no matter what age, you're stuck. I know there are people saying, "well what about the fathers? Shouldn't they be responsible too?" Let's face the facts...you can't make a man take responsibility for his actions. If they did, there wouldn't be any dead beats in the world. Real men take care of their children, boy's don't. So you can ask why the baby daddy's aren't getting involved and letting their baby mommas have a break, well its because they're right up in the club with them buying the drinks.

Another issue with a lot of women who engage in this type of activity is their priorities tend to get mixed up. Meaning that the "wants" seem to outweigh the "needs". Daycare "needs" to get paid, but they "want" to buy a new outfit for the club. Or they "want" a pair of new shoes, but the light bill "needs" to get paid. Then people wonder why these children grow up with no sense of responsibility. Its because they grew up in a house hold were looking good and material things were more important than showing love and taking care of business.

Also, please stop teaching your kids how to "walk it out" and put a book in front of them.

Stop taking relationship advice from people who aren't in relationships!

This is a pet peeve of mine that many people tend to follow, especially women. Taking advice from people who don't know how to run their own lives deserves to get a big "mind your effin business" response from the person that it is told to.

Listen, a woman who doesn't have a man, has no life, no real friends, and low self esteem, is always going to tell the one friend who has everything going for her that her man is like all men and that he ain't sh!t and not to trust him. Its the typical thing for a woman to say when she's jealous and she doesn't want to see anyone else happy. Misery loves company and dark hates light.

Too many women listen to these toxic women with venom on their breath because they may either have low self esteem themselves or they feel like their girl is really being a good friend. You wouldn't take financial advice from a bum would you? You would go to Warren Buffett. So why would you go to your broke down girl who admits to hating men anyways because she's been burned a dozen times, mentally and physically.

The ones who are always talking trash are the ones who constantly stay getting used and abused. They're either the "run-in/jump-off/side piece", what ever you want to call it, or they're that chick who is so desperate for attention that they will do anything to get a man. Its pathetic and embarrassing.

Women nowadays need to start using their own minds and stop listening to nonsense and focus on what makes them happy and content. Women have that intuition that they rely on when they know something is not right. Don't let someone else steer you from what you believe to be the right thing in your life. Only you know whats best for you and no one else. Stop listening to what Ms Blabber Mouth is talking about because she always has something to say and none of it is positive.

Can you really be friends with your Ex?

This is a question that will be debated on for years to come. My whole take on it is that you are an Ex for a reason. The only reason why there should be any communication between the two is only if there is a child involved and nothing else. The communication with that should be minimal as well. I personally am not friends with any of my exes, but that is by choice. I think that it causes too much confusion and mixed signals on both sides. Feelings can get misinterpreted which can resort in someone if not both parties, getting hurt. I'm also not a big fan of the whole back and forth thing. Where the couple breaks up and then gets back together every 3-6 months. That's a no no. If a couple breaks up for whatever reason, what makes them think that a few months apart will resolve the situation? Not making a whole lot of sense to me.

Lets get into why both sexes like to keep there exes as friends. Lets start with the women. Women are real head-gamers when it comes to this particular topic. What I mean by that is that even though the guy may be their ex, she likes to keep him around to play head games with him. At times she may tell him that she is confused and she doesn't know what to do. She may say that she doesn't know if she wants to stay with her current boyfriend or go back to her ex. By saying this, she is giving her ex-boyfriend a false sense of hope that maybe in the near future, they will get back together. The ex, not knowing that this is a game to her, falls for the trap and finds himself following her around like a little dog and jumping to her every beck and call. She'll call him up and ask him to do favors, because she knows that she has the ex at her finger tips. And knowing that he will do whatever she says, she uses this to her advantage. This isn't right, but lets face it, women are evil and men are weak as a result of it. Men who are exes need to understand and be fully aware that you are being played. She has no intentions to be with you again, especially if she was the one who let you go. The "I miss you" and the late night "Are you awake" texts are just part of her evil plan to keep him from finding someone who will love and appreciate him. Instead, she wants to keep him wishfully thinking about a possible future and have him miserably sitting at home anxiously waiting and jumping at every text message hoping that its from her.

Why do guys keep there exes around? SEX!!!! That's the only reason. We're not deep like that. Its not emotional, there's no head games, we're not confused. We just want to continue getting the old benefits while we start on the new benefits. Its as simple as that.

Baby mommas are more expensive than babies

I know half of the people who are reading this are saying WTF!? And I know the other halves are nodding their head in agreement. Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about and don’t act like this statement isn't true. In this day and age where simply shooting a ball through a hoop or rapping lyrics over the hottest beats can garner you success and make you an instant millionaire. Only to realize that the groupie that you invited back to your dressing room after the concert or the female sports fan that you met during the off season at the local night spot, was scheming and plotting all along to somehow get back to your house or hotel room, sleep with you to eventually get pregnant for a pay day of her life. Don’t believe me, here is a list of just a few of the athletes with multiple baby mommas:

Ex NBA Baller Calvin Murphy - 14 illegitimate kids by 9 women.
Ex NFL Football player Travis Henry - 11 kids by 10 women. All of this by 28.
Ex-San Antonio Spur Willie Anderson - 9 illegitimate kids.
Boxer Evander Holyfield - 9 illegitimate kids.
Ex NBA Baller Jason Caffey - 8 kids by 7 women.
Ex NBA Baller Shawn Kemp - 7 illegitimate kids by 6 women last time. Supposedly up to 11 kids by 9 women now.
Ray Lewis - 6 kids by 4 women
Marshall Faulk - 6 kids by 3 women


Now just some of your favorite entertainers:


DMX – 3 that I can count, not including his wife.
Diddy – 6 kids and 3 baby mommas. Quincy, the oldest one, technically isn’t his, but he still claims him
Weezy F. Baby (Lil Wayne) – 4 kids by 4 baby mommas. 2 are actually due in the same month this year.
TI – 6 kids by 3 women.


You pretty much get the idea of what I’m trying to say. Even though, I’m sure that some of these guys might have had some type of a romantic relationship with these women, I totally doubt that they had a relationship with all of them.

Now let's get into why baby mommas are more expensive than babies. I'm going to use Diddy as an example. He's paying a total of $40,000 a month to two of his baby mommas. Now I understand what child support is for. Its not just diapers, food, and clothes. Its daycare, utilities, housing, and after school activities. I get that, but for $20,000 a month, what the hell is the child eating, wearing, or playing. I'm trying to support my child, not your life style. Unfortunately that's what a lot of women are doing when they come up with these extravagant amounts of support. Its different when you've been married to someone for awhile and you have children. But for a "one night stand" or a "jump off" to ask for $5000-$10,000 for child support is retarded. Don't get it twisted, I would want my child to wear nice clothes and go to the best schools, but if her nail technician school dropout, no job having mom, dropped her off at my house for the weekend driving a new Range Rover on twenties and rocking Gucci shoes with a Coach purse, I'm having a fit. That money is not for you to trick on yourself. What do you need a $50,000 truck for when a $18,000 car is just as good. I get that she wants to floss too, but get a job. The child doesn't care what kind of vehicle she's in, so why does it matter. Too many broads are out here looking for a "pay-master" and unfortunately, there are dumb guys out there who are allowing it. I don't know if this is true or not, but I heard of a case where there was a famous athlete who's one night stand kept the condom and artificially inseminated herself to get pregnant, now she's getting big checks. Even if it is true and she really did trick the guy into getting pregnant, the courts still recognize the guy as being the father and by law he is required to pay child support. That's a "F"ed up thing to do, but u hear of stories about condoms getting poked with holes and girls lying about being on birth control all the time. Its a terrible thing that you have women out there who are uncouth and have no morals that do things like this. Its so unfortunate, but true. You also have the women out there who are straight forward who will tell their baby daddy that Lil Ray-Ray needs pampers and formula and also to throw in money so that she can get her "hur" and nails did. For those who didn't understand what I just wrote, it means hair and nails done. Lol.

Another thing to think about is what are these big ballers going to do when the well runs dry? The cash flow won't last forever. And with some of these atheletes and entertainers, most of them don't have an education past highschool, if that. The majority of them don't have the business sense of a Michael Jordan or a Magic Johnson. Some don't know how to parlay their hip hop career into a brand like Jay-Z or 50 cent. Baby mommas don't care and neither do the courts. Jason Caffey, formally of the Chicago Bulls, is in that situation right now. The NBA checks have stopped rolling in years ago, but he's still being ordered to pay the same amout of child support as if he was still playing in the league. The last I heard he was filing for bankrupcy

I don't really think that I have to go into the facts about sleeping around without protection. That's self explanatory in itself especially with the big aids epidemic going on in just DC alone. But here is something to think about. You got this guy with multiple kids by multiple women, its obvious that he's not being safe, so why would you put yourself at risk? The same thing goes for the women. If she's letting you ride bareback without even knowing you, imagine how many other guys she's allowing to go deep without a jimmy hat.

So for the fellas, think twice before you dip your stick or at least strap it up. You might catch something...like a baby momma!

Michael Vick & Donte Stallworth

Mike Vick is no longer in the federal choke hold and is now officially a free man, or is he? For those who are not in the loop, I'll bring you up to speed. Michael Vick was charged for bank rolling a dog fighting ring in his home. He was sentenced for 20 months and subsequently suspended from the NFL. A lot of people feel that was a lot of time for such a crime. Even though I don't condone what he did, I personally think that 18 months of jail time was not necessary. Maybe 3 to 6 months playing ball with the local felons and a HEFTY chunk ripped from his bank account would have been damaging enough.

The problem that I'm having now is that the man did his time and he's still paying for it. The NFL Commissioner has still not reinstated him into the NFL for whatever reason. I personally think it's all about the moolah. I think that the commissioner is afraid to reinstate Vick because he might feel that some of the advertisers will pull out and not want to do business with the league. It's a shame how such a talented athlete can make a mistake, get punished for it, come out after time served, and still can't resume his livelihood. I'm not much of an animal lover, but I do understand what he did was wrong and cruel, but there are people who have done worse crimes and less time. Donte Stallworth, the WR receiver for the Browns, hit a pedestrian and killed him while DUI. He only served 24 days of a 30 day sentence. I got a DUI 5 years ago, didn't kill anyone and served 15 days of a 30 day sentence. Mike Vick kills dogs, which is inhumane, gets 20 months? For dogs??? I'm going to play devil's advocate, since when are animal's lives worth more than people? Do we not live in a society where hunting deer, duck, and rabbit are sports? Do we not kill animals for our own personal human consumption? Yeah, Vick did pit the dogs against each other to fight to the death and he did drown the ones that didn't perform well which is definitely wrong, but what is the difference? What if after he killed the dogs, he ate them, would that have made things ok? No one is going to jail for eating at McDonalds. Those cows are being slaughtered every day. Why isn't that illegal. How come PETA doesn't boycott Diddy for wearing a chinchilla coat? Multiple chinchilla's were killed for that one fur. Why aren't the manufacturers locked up? Little things can be blown out of proportion and an ant hill can turn into a mountain after 5 mins of media coverage. The reason why Vick got 20 months is because PETA was all over that one. They would have protested at every Falcons home and away game and the league didn't want to deal with that. That would have cost them fans and lots of money. But if that was the case, then how come no one was worried about MADD when it came to Stallworth? Didn't they think that Mothers Against Drunk Driving was going to be at every game protesting the light sentence that he got? Even though he has still yet to be reinstated, that has to be a factor. I read in a forum where someone agreed with the light sentence that Stallworth got because the pedestrian was J-walking and wasn't using a cross walk and insinuating that it was the pedestrians fault that he got hit and that if Stallworth wasn't drinking, he would have still hit the man regardless. Look, Stallworths BAC was 0.12. He was clearly impaired and over the legal limit. I personally think that had he not been drinking, he possibly would have missed the man and avoided the accident. I only say that because as a receiver you have to be fast and react in a quick manner. So the guy who wrote that was a complete idiot. Stallworth was wrong for drinking and driving in the first place

There are some people who think Vick shouldn't be reinstated to football because of what he did with the dogs. But there is also another argument out there that kind of does make a lot of sense to me when I first heard it. Someone threw out an argument that if he was working as a 9 to 5 Joe and he had to go to jail for 20 months, his old employer wouldn't automatically give him his job back once he got out, so why should Vick? This is a true statement and I do agree, but Vick isn't an ordinary Joe. Can you run a 4.2? Do you have a pass completion percentage of 53.8? Are you good under pressure in the pocket and can out run most line backers and defensive backs in a tough situation to gain a first down? If you can, then you're not ordinary. Just like I don't think an ordinary Joe would have gotten 20 months of federal time for the exact same charges that Vick got. I figure an ordinary Joe would have gotten maybe 3-6 months tops. Vick wasn't ordinary, he was extraordinary. I'm not riding his nuts or sticking up for what he did, but most people talking trash can't even pee straight let alone throw a football. Not saying that being blessed with athletic ability should get you a free pass in this society either, but let the man continue his career. He paid his debt to society. He doesn't owe anybody anything else as far as I'm concerned.

Momma’s Boy

This is something that I want to bring up because lately, I've been hearing this term a lot. Matter of fact, I've been called this for most of my life. I just want to address some myths and bring out some truths to this expression.

First of all, let's define what the phrase momma's boy means. The wiktionary says that "momma's boy" means, a male who has a very, perhaps too, close bond with his mother, often making him soft. Now, I think that I'm pretty close with my mom, but that doesn't make me a momma's boy and I definitely don't think that I'm soft. There are felons who are in jail with life sentences and they are close with their moms. Does that make them a momma's boy? I don't think so. Another thing, what is too close of a bond with your mother? Does that mean that you call daily to make sure she is ok? Does it mean that you go and see her from time to time and make sure that she doesn't want or need anything? Does it mean that you're old enough to be out on your own, but still live at home? My question is who are you to question someone's living situation based on age and how close a bond a man has with his mother. There may be circumstances as to why a man may still lives at home. There could be medical reasons, financial reasons, or temporarily. None of these things equates to a momma's boy. The phrase, "daddy's girl" doesn't have a negative connotation so why should momma's boy?

Don't get me wrong, there are momma's boys out there, but the term is used too loosely and where it doesn't fit. Here are some examples. Over the age of 25 years old and you still live at home. Not a momma's boy. Why? You have to find out why he's still home. His mom may be sick. He may be sick and needs special treatment, or he may just be lazy and doesn't want to move out. He's just being a mooch. In this case, it makes him a bum. Especially if he's not paying rent. Or he could be saving for a house to move into or a condo. In this case, it's just temporary for financial reasons. Example number two, he calls his mom before he makes any type of life changing decisions. Not a momma's boy. Why? He's just a boy. Any man who can't make any decisions as a man doesn't deserve to be called one. It doesn't have anything to do with his mom. He just doesn't have the God giving sense or balls to make a move. It's different to call and get an opinion. It's another thing to base your opinion on someone else's to make the decision for you. Another example, she pays his bills for him and buys all of his necessities. This one is funny to me because I work in a doctor's office and I see this all of the time. The guys are old enough to pay for their office visits, supplements and prescriptions, yet their mothers pay for it. Now, I use to think this was weird, but it goes back to what I was saying about medical issues. You don't know what his medical status is. We don't know if he's getting disability checks or not. Maybe he got into an accident and he could be waiting for a settlement. These are things that are undetermined and could change the whole dynamic of the situation.

So as often as this expression is thrown around, the truth of the matter is that "momma's boy" is just that, an expression. To me there really is no true meaning because based on what people may think, there is a reason why people do things and say things whether it be justifiable or not.

Beware of red flag romances

In light of the whole McNair/Kazemi murder-suicide, there's a lot to be said about his mistresses mental state. I believe that I read that somewhere, her co-workers were saying that she was depressed. I also heard that she thought that McNair was seeing another woman other than her which might have caused her to snap. It makes you wonder if there were any red flags that might have alerted McNair, or was it possible that he did see the red flags and was trying to break things off. One has to wonder.

Moving away from the McNair situation, I want to address potential red flags to look for, especially right now being that its summer time. See, in my opinion, I believe that most relationships, or "hook ups", start somewhere between spring time and summer. The reason why I say that is because once the weather starts getting nice, people start to venture out to parks and other outdoor activities. By the time summer rolls around, people are having pool parties, cook outs, or just heading to the beach. Also, during this time, college kids are coming home and, they're bringing their college friends to meet their hometown buddies. This making it convenient to make new friends and possible romantic hook ups.

Let's start with the red flags. A common one is someone who is being to clingy or wanting to spend all of their time with you. There's nothing wrong with that, but there are times when you need to give each other some space. If the person you are going out with or "hooking up" with is starting to question where you're going to be and who you are hanging out with, all of the time, I suggest you cut the cord immediately. What's going to end up happening is that he/she is going to want to "self invite" themselves everywhere you go as a means to see what you are doing when you go out. This is nothing but insecurity and if it continued will cause nothing but problems. I suggest having a sit down with the person and letting them know that you are not interested in trying to be with anyone else and that you need to be trusted. Another reason why a person may always be in your business is because they might be cheating on you or doing something that they're not supposed to be doing. This is where the guilt is coming in and they are feeling since they are cheating on you, then you must be cheating on them. As I said before, another red flag rears its ugly head. I suggest you strap up your Nikes and Just Do It!

Here's another one. A person keeps saying to you that you two are meant to be together and that they can't live without you, red flag. Hello, you just met a week ago. How could they possibly come to that conclusion? They were living before they met you. This smells like a psycho to me. If anybody is telling you that you are their soul mate after meeting at a bar or a keg party is definitely bad news.

Also beware of your newfound friend sitting at your doorstep when you arrive home from work. I know someone who likes to pop up at girl's houses that he just met, unannounced. The funny thing about this is that they never give him an address. They just give him the vicinity of where they live or a subdivision and he just drives around in his car looking for the girl's car parked in front of a house or apartment building. He would also call their jobs and often show up there. This is pitiful and borderline stalking. Women and men, for your own safety, never give anyone that you just met any type of information that can lead them to find out where you live or work. This is common sense. You are only setting yourself up for sleepless nights and possibly a court appearance for the issuance of an order of protection.

Another sign to look out for is the kind of person who wants you to be a reciprocator. This person will often tell you that they love you or miss you and if you don't respond in a mutual fashion, this person may become agitated or act sad. They may say things like, "Oh, you don't love me back?", or, "You're not going to miss me when I'm gone? I'm going to miss you!" I personally had an experience with this one before. She used to always ask me how come I don't call her "baby" or give her pet names like she would give me. I thought it was ridiculous. The reason why they tend to do this is because they are insecure about themselves and or the relationship. They are using this technique to somehow get comfort in themselves by hearing someone else telling them that they are loved or missed. It's actually a false sense of security, because the person is being forced to say something that they don't really mean.

I have a big problem with people who try to introduce potential mates to their family, friends or kids too soon. When you introduce people early, it gives them the false impression that you two are actually a couple when you may not be, especially when you've only known the person for a short amount of time. That's not even long enough to introduce them to your pet rat. Now, if the family is aware that you two are only dating or just friends, then it's perfectly fine. Just keep in mind, be very careful who you bring around your friends and family, especially when it comes to your children. Kids are very impressionable and can become attached easily. Also, you don't want to bring around a serial killer or a pedophile unknowingly. You'll be amazed at what people find out about their mate after the fact.

It's ok to be in love or have a summer fling, but you can save yourself a lot of headache and heartache if you follow these simple rules.